Hetalia's own truth or dare!
by CaptinJackOff
Summary: Ohoho! Hetalia truth or dare, things are bound to go wrong. Seme!Germany, Uke!Russia. Many other couples! It's kinda crack. I'm the host Captin . Enjoy!


**Captin: Welcome to my first ever Truth-or-Dare fan fiction! This is a truth or dare involving only one anime. No cross-overs. :P**

**Prussia: Kesese! You're soooo boring!**

**Ludwig: Mein gott…**

**Captin: Shut up Prussia!**

**Ivan: I only like my ideas. Otherwise I kill them all. :)**

**Sour: Intriguing**

**Sasori: R&R! **

**Naruto: This is about the anime… dun dun dun… **

**Sasuke: Get on with it, dobe. Hn.**

**Sour: Foolish, Captin, just say it.**

**Captin: The anime is Hetalia, lol. The main couple is: GermanyxRussia ;)**

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Captin: Okay guys! Here is the game show!

France: Ohonhon! I love a little pervy show.

England: You bloody frog! It's a game show.

Russia: I like sunshine and blood.

Germany: I find vat very unnecessary to kill people.

Greece: I love my precious kitties –pets a random cat.

Turkey: Broski! How the hell you keep all those cats?

Greece: I raised you all by myself –says to a random cat.

America: I love hamburgers, anyone want some?

Russia: Me!

Belarus: No big brother! Marry me!

America: Uhm…

Russia: NO I SHALL NOT! –Hides behind Germany.

Everyone else in Hetalia: …

N. Italy: Veeee!~ So cute!

S. Italy: Shut up!

Canada: Hi guys!

Captin: Who are you?...

N. Italy: Hi other America!

Canada:… what…?

Captin: Okay guys! We gathered all the people in Hetalia. We have gathered into a stage in a circle with a live audience. There are no rules. People who die get revived. Thanks for watching! –Winks at camera.

England: You bloody git!

Captin: Bloody hell you bloke! Just go wank yourself and don't get your knickers in a twist.

England: …You…!

America: Hahahaha! Nice one.

France: Want me to kiss your knickers better? Ohoho.

England: Get… get away from me you frog! –Hits France

Captin: -Twiddles thumbs and digs into bra for a card.

Ukraine: I can never find stuff in my bra…

America: With those vast Netherlands, I can't blame you.

Belarus: Vhops –accidentally throws knife at America.

America: Haha! The hero never gets hurt!

Belarus: -Hits America in the crotch. Vhat vas dat, Amerika?

America: Dear mother of burgers –cringes.

Captin: -Rolls eyes. The card is for Germany from the audience.

Germany: Vell, vhat is it? Go on.

Captin: It's a dare saying to keep your shirt off for a couple rounds.

Germany:… Vhat? Vhat is vrong vit you guys?

Audience: -Cat calls

N. Italy: Vee~ Germany! Germany! You're finally getting attention from the girls.

Greece: Congrats.

Turkey: Lame o.

Norway: Fish fishy fishes! –Facial expression: ^ 3 ^

Denmark: Hell naw! My axe is way better.

Spain: That' what he said.

S. Italy: You stupid tomato bastard!

Belgium: -Throws chocolate at Norway. Fetch fishy! :D

Germany pulls his shirt over his head receiving smirks and winks. England has his mouth gaped open, and France is trying to jump Germany. Russia is blushing and Belarus is trying to rape Russia. All the other nations are staring at them like it happens every day.

Captin: -Blushes and laughs. Woot! Next card is: Dear Russia, I dare you to wear a slutty neko gothic-lolita costume.

Russia: Whatttt? –Facial expression: . /J/ .

Greece: -Blood dripping out of nose.

Turkey: Let me get that for you. –Shoves tissue in Greece's face roughly.

Greece: Oww, ~nya.

Captin: Russia, you slut. ;D –throws costume at Russia and gets bodyguards to escort him to the fitting room.

Every nation: I wonder what he'll look like.

Poland: Like a loser, ha-ha!

Germany: -Pulls double-barrel out at Poland's head. Don't you dear insult Russland you bitch.

Poland: Okay, well… Lithuania told me to do it.

Lithuania: No, it wasn't me! I respect Russia-sama.

Germany: -Smacks Poland upside the head.

Voice: I-I'm here!

Every nation turns around to see Russia standing there wearing the costume. He has fluffy beige neko ears complete with the tail too. Gothic white boots and a black and white Lolita dress. His hair is spiked in the back and he had bangs covering his forehead completely and one eye. He has a small piercing in his left ear.

Everyone: Holy…shit…

Captin: I WILL BARE YOUR CHILDREN!

Germany: -Pulls gun out. NO ONE TOUCH RUSSLAND! HIS SEXY ASS IS MINE.

Russia: Father Germanski… my "sexy" ass is yours…?

Germany: Vat… I didn't say that…

Russia: -Runs out of the game show.

N. Italy: Vee~ You're scary Germany!

Germany: Ivan! Wait!

Captin: -Rolls eyes and takes phone out of her bra.

S. Italy: How the crapolla do you even fit that much stuff in there?

Captin: Dear Romano, I'm a girl. It's called being awesome.

Prussia: Kesese! Awesomeness ;DD

Captin: -Goes to truth or dare app.

Japan: I love all the apps for the iPhone! So unique and kawaii!

China: My hello kitty iPhone design is better than yours Kiku! ~Aru.

Japan: Urasi!

China: Pandas –Rubs a panda plush.

England: Where is did that bloody bloke run off to?

Russia: -Comes back and bitch slaps Germany.

Everyone: "Oooooh."

Germany: -Rubs cheek, I'm sorry Russland.

Russia: -Ignores Germany and goes back his seat.

Captin: Okay, next card says: _Dear Lovino/Romano, I dare you to dress up In a tomato outfit and dance to _**Hips don't lie – Shakira.**

Spain: Sweet mother of churros and tomatos! –Wipes blood off of nose with sleeve.

Captin: -Ushers Romano into the fitting room.

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S. Italy: YOU STUPID FANGIRLS ARE GOING TO PAY! UGGHH!

Spain: But Lovino, you look so delicious. –Says it bluntly.

S

Spain: Eh, I used to think Austria was a puta. But it turns out he's a good guy!

Hungary: He is, you just have to take the chance to get to know him better.

Austria: How absurd –Sips tea.

Prussia: -Goes off laughing. Kehahahahah! Kesesese!

S. Italy: Do I really have to dance to _Shakira?_

Captin: -Says bluntly, Either that or you have to give Spain a lap dance.

Spain: Either option is fine.

England: What in the bloody hell does it have to do with anything?

France: Ohoho! I love ittt.

England: You sick… sick _perv! _

Finland: Merry Christmas!:D

Sweden: And th's, is m'nm wi'f. (_And this, is my wife.)_ –Wraps arm around Finland's waist.


End file.
